Contentment

As you could imagine, my job involves conversations of all sorts with people seeking change in their lives. People seeking to begin families, start new jobs or hoping to get married.

People often request a conversation with a pastor when they want something new. They want their youth to start coming to youth group and begin to take school more seriously. They want to know what it means to be baptized. They want to move houses and are not sure it is the best time. I stay busy talking about change.

In my personal life with friends outside of work, the same type of conversations prevail as well. I have friends who are newly engaged, friends who want to be engaged but are not. I have friends who are having babies and those that wish they could. I have friends seeking new jobs and those who have just started a new one. I have friends who are trying to find their vocational calling and whatever that means for their lives.

In all of these cases, it seems that the common thread is a lack of contentment. There is something that is pushing all of these people I know to seek a change. This push leads people to begin to take steps to motify their situation to a more pleasurable level.

Change, of course, is not necessarily a bad thing. If we didn't constantly adapt and try new things throughout our lives growth would not occur. However, the more I've thought about it recently, the more I've realized that contentment is something that all of need more of, especially as life doesn't often change as fast as we want it to.

While it is hard to be happy sometimes when there are things about your current life situation that we would like to be different, I know there are always things that we can enjoy at any stage of our lives, I think. There are always moments of joy, places of comfort, and words of encouragement that can be found in any situation-- no matter hard it is.

I don't want to sound like Pollyanna (and trust me, I don't prescribe to Pollyanna theology . . . ask my husband as we debate about this all the time). But, at the same time, I do feel strongly that it is good to be in the moment of life wherever this is for TODAY. Even though I often stink at my own advice here.

The goodness of the Christian faith tradition is that we are exhorted to have hope that the Divine is looking out for us, walking alongside us, and always constructing a Plan B when we think all is lost.

So, today, I'm reminding myself of all the goodness that is with me on this life journey with hope for what is ahead and asking you possibly do the same.

Ten Thoughts for Thursday

1. If you were a person with no connection to a church would you call them to ask for a pastor that could: "Could you please interpret John 9:4-5?" (This happened to me yesterday and I spent 30 minutes on the phone having spontaneous Sunday School with this women I didn't know).

2. I really do hate it when my husband travels or I'm away from home at conferences alone. I'm counting the days until he comes home from his latest trip for work!

3. If you are working with a younger pastor it is never a good idea to tell them when he or she walks into a room: "Wow, you look like a kid!" (This happened to me on Monday when I was doing a funeral for someone I'd never met. I hope that as I opened my mouth during the sermon time she felt I wasn't such of a kid).

4. I think the Olympic coverage is a drug. The more I watch the more I want to watch and the less sleep I'm getting each day.

5. There is joy to be found for a former teacher and a school supply lover at Staples. (I took a trip there one day this week at lunchtime and it cheered me for the rest of the day. Oh the smell of new school supplies . . . even though I wasn't buying any).

6. Never underestimate the power of remembering someone's birthday-- no matter what we tell others, we always want to know that others remember our date of birth and want to celebrate us.

7. There is something weird about chatting with someone on Facebook (technology has gone just a little too far), but I seem to love it.

8. When you are in a profession where you have to pay quarterly taxes, it is best to write down on your calendar when you have to pay them. Otherwise, you might find yourself like me, paying them two months late. (But I guess the government will never refuse money!)

9. Oh, how I wish I would have taken grammar lessons more seriously in school. I could kick myself every day that I'm starring at my computer pondering the difference between affect and effect.

10. I have come to the conclusion that I really do hate exercise and love my couch. Yet, the goal is to love exercise one day or at least do it more than I sit on my couch.

The Ups and Downs

Ministry is a funny thing, especially around a church (or any non-profit for that matter).

When you depend so heavily on volunteer support of all that you do, there are naturally times of the year when you are busier than others based on the amount of time volunteers are able give you.

Right now, volunteers aren't giving much of their time. School will be starting soon in our county and everyone is on vacation. There are those last minute family outings, so no one wants to come to a committee meeting. Everyone I know seems to be busy. Yet I'm not really sure what they are doing. . .

So much of what I do depends on committee work (welcome to the world of associate pastor land). While you would think I'd feel a great sense of freedom without the meetings, without them I don't feel as productive as I usually do.

This time of the year becomes the "take a deep breathe" from the crazy summer and "inhale a deep breath" of the wild fall to come. But such breathing is done alone for now and I don't like it as much.

This week my tasks include planning education classes for Sunday nights in the fall, scheduling youth events for the coming year and creating my budget for the next church year among other things. These are very important administrative tasks, yet harder for me to concentrate on. I miss the interaction with people!

Yet, even in my boredom of quality time with my computer, I realize that down time is good. This season of the year reminds me that not every week is as busy as others are. It is special to enjoy a Tuesday night at home instead of in my office at work. It is well worth my time to have a thoughtful plan for discipleship in the coming months. The "hermit" time in the office will go along way to helping things run more smoothly in the coming months.

However, I'll be ready for everyone to return to church and the usual routine of life to come back!

Time to Dedicate!

Since my ordination, I've led all of pastoral special services: baptisms (8), weddings (5), funerals (6), and numerous services of communion. However, until last Sunday, I' d never led a baby dedication. I was pretty excited to celebrate my first!

For those of you who aren't familiar with the Baptist tradition, we do not baptize infants, but dedicate them. Dedication involves narrative about the child and his or her family, litanies, prayers and presentation of the child to the church. (In the picture above I was reading the scripture about Jesus welcoming children to begin the presentation).

Baptism comes whenever the person is able to knowledge faith for themselves and usually comes around the time of confirmation within other Christian traditions, though may not occur until adulthood.

What makes infant dedications so special?

Services of infant dedication are for the the parents. They are a time for the parents, other family members and other close family friends to declare before a congregation that they promise to help their child come to know faith for themselves one day. And the parents promise to love their child as he or she grows up and be examples of kindness, compassion and faithfulness to him or her.

Infant dedications are also for the congregation at large. They are a time for the congregation to pledge their support to the parent(s) to help nurture the child. These services remind everyone of their responsibilities to the ministry of Christian education in church life.

And, while prayers of blessing are a part of the dedication, there is no overly special thing about the prayer that we feel will set the child a part. The hope comes in the community surrounding the child. It is the job of the community to bless the child as he or she grows up.

In this case, it was a happy day to welcome the dedication service of two year-old Nathan. All of us are hopeful that great things are in store for Nathan and that he will come to know the goodness of Christian community as we have experienced it too. Thanks be to God for the blessing of his life.

Our Two Week Addiction

I have to admit I'm not a huge sports fan. I watch basketball when Duke is playing in the winter and figure skating from time to time, but really that is it unless I go to a baseball game with friends. However, there is something special about the Olympics. It always seems to turn me into a instant addicted fan.

I have fond memories of watching both the summer and winter games as a child. Especially during the 1992 summer games I can remember being glued to the tv at my grandparents lakehouse in TN. It was as if all the fun water sports outside didn't exist. Then, in 1996 when the games came to Atlanta, my uncle was gracious enough to get me tickets to a women's basketball game. It was a match between two relatively unknown countries, but I didn't care. I was at the Olympics! And from then on the magic of it all makes me excited to think about the games every two years.


My husband is the same way. He has tons of sporty friends and will watch sporting events if social fun is involved, but doesn't keep up with the scores or results of any particular team. But he's an Olympic fan too, especially as he was on the staff of the 1996 games in Atlanta working the entire summer as a one of the host guides and program coordinators. (It is cool to think we could have walked past each other then and not even known it!)

Thus, we've been glued to the tv every night since Friday watching everything from swimming and gymnastics to beach volleyball. And we love watching the Today Show coverage of the games in the morning before work too!

While I'm not super hyper about nationalism (I believe loving people means loving all nations of the world not just those who are Americans), there is just something about the Olympics that makes you excited to be from your home country. It has been a lot of fun to cheer on the men's gymnastics team hoping they would medal (and they did). I've been nervous for the swimmers watching them race to the finish, being especially mesmerized by the men's relay team that beat France the other night to win the goal. It is a good feeling to feel like "your team" is winning in a way that lives are not lost (aka war).


Not only do I feel more connected to the country where I live, but to other places around the globe as well. There is also something special about watching the feature stories about athletes from other countries and feeling like you get to know someone that you would never of otherwise met. My favorite are about how some struggled to get to the games even when the proper training and equipment is not available to them. They come to the games with the victory being in their presence!


For these reasons and more, our house will be addicted to the tv until the games are through. It is such a nice summer break to feel as though you've gone somewhere cool even when you are just in your living room!

Anybody else have my addiction?

Buying a Car

Since most of my education and personal interests fall in the liberal arts realm, I've never really thought of myself as a business or finance type of person. I don't know a lot about the stock market, interest rates or the like. My experience though, of being savvy to the ways of money, insurance and credit makes the world go around has grown of course since I've been living on my own for years. And, even more so now, being married to a man who works in the business field on a daily basis. I've learned so much from him (which I know will go a long way to help the churches I serve in the future).

Though I've come far, I didn't think I was the one in our family to take the lead in negotiating the price of the car purchase we were to make this month.

Our problem was this: my husband's car lease had expired and he needed something more economical with the gas prices soaring. When he asked for my help, I told him that I was not really not all that interested in types of cars anyway. If a car gets to me to point A from point B, I'm happy. Furthermore, if he was going to drive the new car, there was really no need for me to be involved until it came time to sign my name to the loan.

But, I was wrong. I had negotiating skills I never knew I had and I really enjoyed the process!

After a failed attempt to get the price on the car that we could afford at one dealer (we had to cut ties with them after being lied to and walk out), I knew it was my time to step in and get involved. Car dealers are so generally so slimy anyway that it takes as many brains working together to beat them.

I made several calls to dealerships that we had not looked into yet. I quickly learned my car lingo. I was not afraid to talk about model numbers, APR financing and ask how many cylinders the car had.

In the end, we found a dealer that seemed more above board than most. I drew a hard line about what we would pay and what we would not. I refused to sit around the dealership for hours while the finance manager thought of ways to trick us and the sales rep stalled. I asked for what I wanted. And, I believe we got a great price on the car that was our top choice (minus the interior color... hey you can't have everything you want, you know!).

My favorite part of the experience came when the finance manager figured out that I had been out of grad school for a couple years. He asked me: "Which business school did you attend?" With a smile on my face, I answered: "I graduated from divinity school." I loved watching this man's face come off of the floor. "No, way! Not you?"

Yes, even the women preacher types can buy cars. And with enough good research and determination, she can find one at a good price too!

P.S. We purchased a Nissan Altima and love it!

Going Back to School

I am just now getting around to posting about last week because it was indeed a busy one, but for many good reasons.

On Tuesday morning, I went back to school . . . just for the week.

This spring, I found that I was accepted in a leadership program especially for pastors under the age of 35 through the Lewis Center for Church Leadership at Wesley Seminary. The goal of the program is to retain young clergy in the church. The statistics show both that their is an age gap between clergy retiring over the next ten years and young clergy staying the church. And often times young clergy are leaving the church faster than they come in to work with non-profits and other careers because of lack of proper challenge, supervision and appropriate feedback. The Lewis Fellows program is seeking to change this trend with 30 young leaders at a time.

Over the course of the week, I sat in lectures, visited innovative churches and discussed much about casting a vision for a church with several new colleagues and friends. I heard stories from the other Lewis Fellows about what life is like in their church from places as far away as California to as close as pastors in my own backyard. In the picture to the left, you can see some of us in conversation with each other on the bus on our way to a church site visit. (It is a game of "Where's Waldo?" to find me).

The biggest lesson I took with me from the experience was the difference between a leader and a manager. Lovett Weems, the director of the Lewis Center and our conference leader said: "You can manage without a vision, but you can not lead without a vision. And, what separates a leader from the managers is vision to guide you."

Notably, I had been a part of managing vs. leadership conversations before. I have written vision statements for organizations that I have been a part of. But, something about the way this material was presented last week struck me differently.

I realized that much of what is expected of you as an associate pastor falls under the management field. You organize programs, you help people stay the course with goals already set, and you stay on top of urgent tasks to unsure they are accomplished. You provide the stability needed for a "getting things done" kind of church.

Yet, this is not where my heart is. Some days I wish that I felt less like an event planner or the communication hub of the office. Some days I wish that I could feel more like a leader who is enabled to cast vision for the larger good of an organization.

Even so, there are still opportunities for leadership growth where I am. There are areas of ministry that I do lead. I came away from the conference inspired to inspire others to a greater extend of what God can do in my corner of the world right now. It is an exciting journey.