A Wedding, Funeral and Preaching, International Style
I am sad I haven't had the time to add a new blog entry lately, but I guess like all ministers, December and the Advent season has been particularly busy. Christmas parties, special services and activities around church have abounded. By this Thursday night, I will have hosted three parties. I have to say I'm feeling quite tired and am looking forward to some rest the week after Christmas (if that is possible).
Last week was the most interesting weeks of my job thus far, calling on me to employ my title of Rev. in full force for the first time.
On Tuesday morning, I was going about the business of doing normal office days around the office when a phone call came in from a funeral home that our church has a good relationship with. A family had just lost their 72 year old mother to cancer and couldn't find a pastor who was willing to do the service. Charlie, the senior pastor, quickly handed over this responsiblity to me, and I was soon on my way to the funeral home to get to know a family in preparation for doing the funeral the next day. I had no idea really what was expected of me in terms of presence once I greeted the family. I tried to listen a lot and ask many questions about what kind of person this mother had been like. And, I was happy to find out that this family had no church afflication (not that I don't like people being in church), because on this occasion it was good that there were not preconceived ideas about what the "minister" should be doing (because frankly, I was just doing what seemed best to me in the moment). I was also thankful that although they commented on how young I was, they still took me serriously as a pastor.
It was quite a moment to be with this family on Wednesday morning during the service and then at the graveside. I was touched by the holiness of it all. Passing from death to life is such a sacred moment. Even though doing this funeral "messed up" some of my plans for the week, I was thankful to be with this grieving family, helping to remind them of God's concern and presence in their life. I hope that one day this family will return to church.
Afterwards, the funeral director asked me how many funerals I had done. I said hesitantly, "It was my first." I was happy hear him say that he couldn't tell. Of course I was nervous, but I tried my best to go with the flow and be as confident as I could be in my pastoral office that led me to this event. I knew if I acted like I'd done 50 funerals, they would think so too and feel at ease with my leadership.
Then, Thursday night, I participated in my first wedding rehersal which was followed by a Friday night wedding. As part of my duties at church, I recently learned I will be sharing the load of weddings with the senior pastor. Thus, I needed practice as I've never done the offical wedding vows before (even though I've been a scripture reader at friends' weddings more times than I can count-- it is the job you get when your friends know you are in divinity school). I really appreciated Charlie giving me the opportunity to help out in the service without carrying the entire load of being in charge. I learned a lot about how the wedding party especially looks to you as the pastor not only for direction of where to sit, stand, etc, but for spiritual guidance. So much encouragement went on behind the scenes by Charlie and I to make the ceremony both flow well and also be a meaningful event for all parties involved. I've never thought about a wedding as pastoral care, but after this weekend, I am convinced that it includes a lot of it.
My week concluded with a 13 hour church day on Sunday. I guess there isn't rest for the weary on the third Sunday in Advent! As part of Sunday's events, I preached at the Burmese mission congregation which meets in our building. It was a neat opportunity to be invited into such a setting, especially as I spent three weeks in Burma in 2002. I talked about several of my experiences there within the context of my sermon and although I wasn't sure several of the the congregation members understood a word I said (the translation didn't come til I was completely finished), I loved seeing the joy on their faces. I'm very happy to continue to build bridges with this congregation and its people. Multicultural community is hard work, but I think the effort is well worth it!
What fun I'm having here! But, I also need a long nap too.
Last week was the most interesting weeks of my job thus far, calling on me to employ my title of Rev. in full force for the first time.
On Tuesday morning, I was going about the business of doing normal office days around the office when a phone call came in from a funeral home that our church has a good relationship with. A family had just lost their 72 year old mother to cancer and couldn't find a pastor who was willing to do the service. Charlie, the senior pastor, quickly handed over this responsiblity to me, and I was soon on my way to the funeral home to get to know a family in preparation for doing the funeral the next day. I had no idea really what was expected of me in terms of presence once I greeted the family. I tried to listen a lot and ask many questions about what kind of person this mother had been like. And, I was happy to find out that this family had no church afflication (not that I don't like people being in church), because on this occasion it was good that there were not preconceived ideas about what the "minister" should be doing (because frankly, I was just doing what seemed best to me in the moment). I was also thankful that although they commented on how young I was, they still took me serriously as a pastor.
It was quite a moment to be with this family on Wednesday morning during the service and then at the graveside. I was touched by the holiness of it all. Passing from death to life is such a sacred moment. Even though doing this funeral "messed up" some of my plans for the week, I was thankful to be with this grieving family, helping to remind them of God's concern and presence in their life. I hope that one day this family will return to church.
Afterwards, the funeral director asked me how many funerals I had done. I said hesitantly, "It was my first." I was happy hear him say that he couldn't tell. Of course I was nervous, but I tried my best to go with the flow and be as confident as I could be in my pastoral office that led me to this event. I knew if I acted like I'd done 50 funerals, they would think so too and feel at ease with my leadership.
Then, Thursday night, I participated in my first wedding rehersal which was followed by a Friday night wedding. As part of my duties at church, I recently learned I will be sharing the load of weddings with the senior pastor. Thus, I needed practice as I've never done the offical wedding vows before (even though I've been a scripture reader at friends' weddings more times than I can count-- it is the job you get when your friends know you are in divinity school). I really appreciated Charlie giving me the opportunity to help out in the service without carrying the entire load of being in charge. I learned a lot about how the wedding party especially looks to you as the pastor not only for direction of where to sit, stand, etc, but for spiritual guidance. So much encouragement went on behind the scenes by Charlie and I to make the ceremony both flow well and also be a meaningful event for all parties involved. I've never thought about a wedding as pastoral care, but after this weekend, I am convinced that it includes a lot of it.
My week concluded with a 13 hour church day on Sunday. I guess there isn't rest for the weary on the third Sunday in Advent! As part of Sunday's events, I preached at the Burmese mission congregation which meets in our building. It was a neat opportunity to be invited into such a setting, especially as I spent three weeks in Burma in 2002. I talked about several of my experiences there within the context of my sermon and although I wasn't sure several of the the congregation members understood a word I said (the translation didn't come til I was completely finished), I loved seeing the joy on their faces. I'm very happy to continue to build bridges with this congregation and its people. Multicultural community is hard work, but I think the effort is well worth it!
What fun I'm having here! But, I also need a long nap too.
posted by Musings @ 9:09 AM
2 Comments:
At 8:24 PM ,
Anonymous said...
Aw, it sounds like your in such an awesome place right now. I, too, got to co-officiate a wedding for the first time around. I was grateful for that. I had sung in about a jillion weddings but hadn't really learned all the ins and outs of---especially---running the rehearsal!
It's so neat to read about your first year.
At 9:08 PM ,
Anonymous said...
God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
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